By Chou Hallegra, Certified Family Trauma Professional How much credence do you put into trust in your everyday dealings? For such a small word, trust is extremely powerful. It can build or break relationships that are beyond repair. When it comes to your family, love and trust go hand in hand. All children love their parents from birth. The trust aspect isn’t always so easy to maintain. When your child’s trust is lost, their love begins to diminish as well. If you want to maintain a healthy relationship not just with your child, but with your family, you need to know that they trust you. Think about the consequences this might have as they turn from children into adults. If they can’t trust their own parents, how can they trust and respect what the world has to offer them? One thing you need to keep in mind is that a child’s understanding of the word “trust” may be different to yours. To instill trust in your child, you need to show them that they can trust you, no matter what. Always talk with your children in an open manner. Don’t try to sneak around just to see what they are doing. Sneaky and suspicious parents are only going to raise sneaky and suspicious children. Your young toddler is going to trust that you are there to pick them up when they fall, while learning to walk. They trust that you will feed them and change them. This means that even from such an early age, your child unconditionally loves and trust you, so why does this change? Things change as your child grows because of the actions they see and hear around them. If you constantly break promises and don’t keep your word, your child will do the same. For example, if you told your child they can’t have a cookie because they didn’t pick up their toys. Then 10 minutes later, you relent. You have just shown your child that you don’t keep to your word. Repeating this pattern regularly will break the bond of trust. Not lying to your children is another important factor. While sometimes it is necessary to cover up something small, for their own sake, telling outright lies is not going to help your relationship. Always be an approachable parent. Don’t be the type that always gets mad over the smallest mishap. If you do, then your child won’t trust that they can confide in you or ask for your advice. If you constantly get mad, then your child just won’t bother you anymore. Children learn from their parents, which is why it is vital that you always keep your word, are honest, calm, and understanding. This is the best approach for growing that bond of love and trust between you and your family.
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